Legacy

For me, this work is a way of confronting my difficult relationship with my father. It is currently the only way I can ‘communicate’ with him. I stole three of his paintings – underpaintings – and then transformed them.

Still Life. To me, the subject of this painting symbolises my family’s tendency to hoard objects, which have often been the cause of arguments and blackmail. Objects overwhelm me. I removed the canvas from the frame. I pulled the threads out one by one, then wound them onto a spool. I wanted to speed up the process, but it proved impossible. The prospect of unpicking the whole thing terrified me, so I focused on small sections. The threads cut into my hands. This tedious task required great sensitivity, striking a balance between strength and delicacy. I’ve been struggling with this for as long as I can remember. Paint flaked off onto my body, then fell to the floor. I deemed it superfluous. The thick dust made it hard for me to breathe. I stopped the process ten centimetres from the end.

Landscape. I swapped the sky and the ground.

Flowers. I like this painting in its early stages. I’m leaving it untouched.

The underpaintings are a seed, a potential. Much could still happen to them. But it won’t. I have taken control of them – I have made the beginning the end, telling my own story. I did it in a calculated way. Yes, I too have an oppressive side to me, that pinches.